Wednesday, August 04, 2010


As difficult it is to admit, we live in a world of “what ifs”. And as much as we try to delve away from the notion, we find ourselves battling it out with a far cry. Often times, we fail. I would have to estimate only 2 out of 10 people are lucky enough not to be deceived. I say, it takes a lot of practice and courage. I use the term “practice” loosely, as it stems from the different ways people are able to handle certain aspects of their lives. Courage, too, comes in different forms but it really starts and/or results in one common motif. This is the ability of one to accept realitythat sometimes, things do not go according to plan; that sometimes, you have to swallow your pride when faced with crass judgments of people around you; that sometimes, it is better to look at the bright side at your lowest point; and that sometimes, you have to get hurt in order to move on.

As cliché as they all may sound, these are things that keep us going. Although we may not accept these coping mechanisms, we really think about these—whether it be consciously (like a guidebook) or unconsciously (like a silent agreement) do not really matter. We just do.

I carry on with life knowing that problems and heartaches are constant but there will always be something good that I can get out of those. The most important lesson in my life would have to be one that my late brother taught me when I was trying to understand why he passed away and I saw his box of quotations, randomly picked out one out a hundred (and I know I have mentioned this one too many times here): Things happen for a reason. There are no mistakes, accidents, or coincidences. Things happen for a reason. Learn from it.

I still fall for the trap of “what ifs”. I would be a hypocrite if I say otherwise. But the thing is, if I allow myself to, I would be moving backwards. Life has so much to offer that it would be a waste to build a perfect world of “what ifs” and not get a hold of reality.

I dared myself recently: Open your eyes to what is laid down in front of you. No matter how difficult or painful it is, deal with it. Never allow yourself to justify the actions of people that hurt you. If it hurts, you will heal, eventually.
Go out there, break the castles of your what ifs and face reality. You will be okay.