(1) LOVE ON HALT

If there is one thing that I would want to be good at, it would deff be drawing.

Exhibit A: Love On Halt illustration is a disaster. But I am just trying to make the first chapter animated.



Back in college, my groupmates and I were given a task to portray unrequited love. It was hard enough to evoke the condition through dramatization as it was hard enough to act infront of our literature class. How do we show unrequited love--its causes, its conditions, its effects--when we know that the pain it causes never ends with just a drop of tear. To show unrequited in love and put it into a photograph, to me, was the best portrayal of the topic. Why so, you ask. In this situation, you just stay still, not moving, waiting for the other person to come to his senses... just like a photograph. A lot may say a photograph captures the best of the best but I think there is more to the best than there actually is. The truth.

The truth is hard to accept. Can love be measured? Does it have an expiration date? When do you stop? When do you give up? How do you cope? Will you want out? Am I losing? Is this a game?

And a lot more questions.

I have a template for these things that come about when my friends are in a deep love coma. "It takes courage to love someone more than yourself. But it takes more than courage to accept the fact that IT cannot be." What could IT be? Acceptance. "You know, there are things that cannot be handed out to you instantly. Sometimes, even if you work really hard for it, it still won't happen." Yes, rants about life-is-unfair take place BUT... "There is no other way to heal but to accept. Accept that he isn't the guy of your dreams. Accept the fact that he will not call you everyday. Accept the fact that he would rather spend his time hanging out with other girls while you sit at home on weekends. Accept the fact he will reel you in and drop you in an instant. Accept the fact that there is no future. Accept the fact that he could never be yours." Ouch. Reality hits. But that is the sad truth. There are things in life that do not belong together. There is no magnet.

So, I end that template with a shrug and "You will be okay. You just have to suck it up and never let the jerk see you cry".

P.S.
I thought it would be funny to put a watermark on my photo. You know, my art work is something that is hot and prone to internet photo thefts. Ha ha ha!

ONE, TWO, THREE

The past week has been a reflection of my views toward the ever so delicate topic that is none other than the 4-letter word most of us are afraid of... L-O-V-E.

We would talk about over coffee, think about it when we are alone, rant about it over the phone--yes, it is everywhere. Last week, three of my closest friends have asked for my advice regarding the topice ven if my credibility was unfavorable. On top of that, I received Formspring questions asking me the following: Are you in love? Have you ever had a boyfriend? Plus one that is nothing but disturbing--occasional questions such as Wanna get it on? I, of course, would not dare, for the life of me, answer those questions individually. If I have a boyfriend at the moment, trust that the things that you would be reading here are all about our heated discussions regarding the ending of the movie that have seen; our silent moments during our coffee dates, which I would consider precious; how he excused himself from dinner to buy the flowers that the vendors were selling outside some Italian restaurant we were dining in; how he supported me for my undying love for grease-y burgers and fries; how he laughed at me when I was wearing a dress plus my Hello Kitty combat boots; and so on. So, the answer to those questions is no, which I am deff okay with.

Now, ask me why. Three friends, three different stories and situations.

To make this even more exciting but more so to oblige myself to post an entry everyday, I will talk about each of one and divide it into three sections because I am very much inspired to talk about this and make you come to a very important conclusion.

PRETTY LITTLE LIARS

As you all know (or not), I am very much addicted to the book series-cum-TV series, Pretty Liars that I decided to channel all four for my next set of looks on both Lookbook and Chictopia. I am down to the last one. I will be posting photos that my cousin Clara took plus a whole random knick knacks on what I have been up to lately.


So you all saw my Spencer look. I love Troian Bellisario, if I had her face, life would be so much better. Ha ha.

I do not think I pulled off Aria in these set of photos, wardrobe-wise at least, but the photography made up for it. Dark, gloomy, mysterious. I think the photos below convey the character.




Here is a sneak peek of my next look, which I am very excited to wear outside.


Channeling Emily with a little bit of flare. I cannot go by without over accessorizing, especially when I am just in jeans and a ragged polo. I will post this look soon.


My recent profile photo. I am wearing my black doll eyes contacts. They make my eyes look bigger.

Have you guys come across the MTV mockumentary, My Life As Liz? Today, after a 30-minute trip to get an NBI clearance, I took a nap and woke up with the sudden urge to dress like Liz--laid-back, no-care-for-the-world, easy-going, and all other antonyms of "uptight", which is the word that would best describe me.


Rotate... your computer. It's been almost 3 years since I last wore my Converse. I am excited to get the Hello Kitty edition of Doc Martens. I cannot hide how stoked I am.

I accompanied my friend Kandee awhile ago. We went out to get her BlackBerry and had coffee with Shai, Eleu, and Steph after. It was raining mad and I was worried about my car. It pukes pink, I laugh with contentment every time I see it from afar. You would not miss my car. I call RHYME!


I live for Starbucks. It is my lifeline, next to my phone. I came across the very first barista who asked the correct spelling of my name. I am so happy to see this. She spelled it correctly (with my help, of course) and had to take a photo of it. Thank you, Lala!


Tradition. I am happy!

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WHERE DOES THE GOOD GO

I finally got to update my Chictopia and now, under construction, my Lookbook. I am down with a cold + sore throat and what better way to ease the pain than to update the overdue photos I have been longing to post ages ago. I am not a fan of Photoshop--all because I do not know how to dance my way through the effects and all of its wonders. I am more of an "enhance-in-iPhoto-in-just-one-click" type of person. And most probably because my cousin Clara does all wonders by manually tinkering with her, I would like to believe, her beacon of hope, her armor, also known as her camera. I found a way to place multiple photos in one canvas using Photoshop, which is, of course, the farthest I can get.

I am addicted to the TV series Pretty Little Liars. My latest look is inspired by my favorite liar, Spencer. Full deets on the look HERE.










Photos by: Clara Tan -- Please do visit her site, a collection of how awesome her photography is.

"Where do you go with your broken heart in tow? What do you do with the left over you? And how do you know when to let go?
Where does the good go” – Where Does The Good Go, Tegan & Sara

ALL YOU GOT

Because I cannot think of a better title. I am listening to All You Got by Tegan And Sara

When us girls get together, we get together. We pick up where we left off, we tease each other every chance we get, we fall into silence from a momentous laughter and then laugh again. We have known each other for more than half of our lives, which I find very odd--a total mix of characters, if hand-picked by qualifications, characteristics, personality, hobbies, and so on, we would not have been chosen to be part of the same group. So, how do we stand each other considering the hail blend of personalities? I do not know. Tell me. If I message them one by one to answer this question, I would probably get a uniform response: "... Love you, Trish, go to bed." But this is what I think makes our friendship "long-lasting", so to speak. It is that we have no definite answer as to how we ended up as friends... We love and support each other despite our mixing bowl of personalities. (We miss you, Karryl and Chesca!)


Back in 2004, our senior year in high school. (L-R): Shai, Karla, Kat, Kandee, Laverne, and Con.


July 2010, Tagaytay for Kandee's birthday. We are missing two people: Chesca and Karryl.


Taken tonight, Karla's early birthday dinner/drinks. Thank God for side bangs, digital perm, hair dye, colored contact lenses, and a progressed knowledge on fashion.

Can u tell who's who? Tee-hee.

RUNDOWN PAR EXCELLENCE

This week has got to be the most record-breaking week I have ever had in my entire life--full of love, surprises, and undying appreciation.

The rundown:

- I am more than lucky enough to be connected to the web world at all times--I get to discover new things, read interesting blogs, and get to connect with awesome people! I have always wanted to "pimp" my blog and make it vampishly alluring to the eyes. And what better way to do this than to have such an amazing banner that I could not, in heaven's name, create? Thank you very much, Jessica Yun (Sydney) for stumbling upon my humble abode (and what is known to me as my blog--my lifeline). The banner is super-awesome. I am happy beyond words.

- My brother arrived from a 4-day trip to China.

- I had my first ever facial c/o my aunt who is a dermatologist and a good one at that. I had my pimple injected, blemishes cleared, skin tightened and rejuvenated, eyebrows lifted, nose enhanced, and who would have thought this could be taken care of... breasts augmented. I am kidding about the last three, of course.

- I had a few drinks with BC (my college friends). It was a major catch-up session over barbeque and banoffee pie. I do not have a group photo with them (cry!). First photo is of Philip (such a good friend) and I--he was trying to get a photo of him and the scribbles on my back (my face!). Second photo is of Sacha, me, and Bea. Speaking of Bea, I was at Forever21 the other day and saw her. I called out her name, almost gave her a hug... It was not her. It was a stranger who looked like Bea. Thank God, I was not slapped on the face, stoned to death... Only burning from sheer humiliation. I will talk about this some other time. Photos by: Pau Andanar




- My super cute friend Manuel celebrated his 22nd birthday along with his bestfriend (and a friend of mine, as well) Danica, who has grown to be such a beautiful lady. Geez, I sounded like a mom.



- Finally had coffee with Kam 3 days back. Just awhile ago, I had coffee and early dinner with Kam, Diane, and Angela. We will never ever get tired of talking for hours. I ordered my usual vanilla latte at Starbucks. I had China green tea with lots of honey, too.



- THE HIGHLIGHT OF THIS WEEK: my Kong-kong (grandfather) surprised me with a hot pink metallic car. I will write a meaningful entry on this one.



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Hey. i really admire you. your blog consists of fashion, inspiration, and different things. you're so pretty. Girl, you're better off without smoking :) Just a suggestion. Hahaha :)

Thank you very, very much! Thank you for inspiring me to blog more. I'm really trying my best to cut down on smoking, it's such a bad habit. :-(

Ask me anything. Tell me something.

( can i make you a blogger banner? :D )

Hi! Yes, please!!! That's really sweet. :-) Thank you, thank you!

Ask me anything. Tell me something.

You're version of the only exception was cool. It made me teary eyed because of the picture! Oh my. Can we be friends?

Thank you very much. I'm getting teary-eyed because your comment/question. Of course! Hee hee. :-)

Ask me anything. Tell me something.

ive been reading your blog for a year now. your life seems to be really interesting. (:

Wow! Thank you very much. :-)

Ask me anything. Tell me something.

I seriously wanna be your friend :( for the pass 2 months i've been looking to your blog. you seem to be a nice person. your bro's proud of you, i can tell :)

Aww, thank you very much. That means a lot. I shall keep blogging!

Ask me anything. Tell me something.

BLACK

I have been wanting to change my old contacts (Coffee--mix of green, gray, and brown). Thanks to my tita, she knows of a friend who sells the black ones that I have been craving for months now. It is a big change though. The first time I wore it, I look scary.


Channeling one of the Korean pop stars. Ha ha! Fail. One thing I love most about these new eyes is that they make my eyes look bigger.


To make the whole Korean look perfect, I struggled with doing a peace sign. It was impossible, thanks to my Key connector ring. I have been wearing it everyday since I got about a month ago. I also have one in silver.

CASTLES OF "WHAT IFS"

As difficult it is to admit, we live in a world of “what ifs”. And as much as we try to delve away from the notion, we find ourselves battling it out with a far cry. Often times, we fail. I would have to estimate only 2 out of 10 people are lucky enough not to be deceived. I say, it takes a lot of practice and courage. I use the term “practice” loosely, as it stems from the different ways people are able to handle certain aspects of their lives. Courage, too, comes in different forms but it really starts and/or results in one common motif. This is the ability of one to accept reality—that sometimes, things do not go according to plan; that sometimes, you have to swallow your pride when faced with crass judgments of people around you; that sometimes, it is better to look at the bright side at your lowest point; and that sometimes, you have to get hurt in order to move on.

As cliché as they all may sound, these are things that keep us going. Although we may not accept these coping mechanisms, we really think about these—whether it be consciously (like a guidebook) or unconsciously (like a silent agreement) do not really matter. We just do.

I carry on with life knowing that problems and heartaches are constant but there will always be something good that I can get out of those. The most important lesson in my life would have to be one that my late brother taught me when I was trying to understand why he passed away and I saw his box of quotations, randomly picked out one out a hundred (and I know I have mentioned this one too many times here): Things happen for a reason. There are no mistakes, accidents, or coincidences. Things happen for a reason. Learn from it.

I still fall for the trap of “what ifs”. I would be a hypocrite if I say otherwise. But the thing is, if I allow myself to, I would be moving backwards. Life has so much to offer that it would be a waste to build a perfect world of “what ifs” and not get a hold of reality.

I dared myself recently: Open your eyes to what is laid down in front of you. No matter how difficult or painful it is, deal with it. Never allow yourself to justify the actions of people that hurt you. If it hurts, you will heal, eventually.
Go out there, break the castles of your what ifs and face reality. You will be okay.

THE ONLY EXCEPTION

The thing is, I have always been good at giving advices, especially when it comes to love. I doubt I got it from real-life experience. I must have gotten my skills in giving love advices that, if I may add, are most of the time true--where most of my friends would end up saying "exactly". I tell my friends to break their walls, loosen up, and believe in love. "Risk it"--risk the feeling of pain and heartache because you would not know if you do not dive in. As the old saying goes, "it's easier said than done". I am able to analyze every situation of my friends' love lives from start to finish, or at least until when it starts to blossom. I am able to say, "stop seeing the bastard, he's breaking your heart. You deserve someone better." I am able to tell whether the relationship is about to rot and whip up ways to bring the spark back. I am able to decipher the line between the path to friendship and the path to relationship. All these I can never tell myself. I can never convince myself of the fact that love is not all about the romantic stuff only, but filthy obstacles come along with it as well. I can never convince myself that there is someone out there for me, who will not break my heart. It is not that I do not believe in love or have given up on it. This brings me to a theory, single ladies are single not because they want or choose to be. They (or should I say, we?) are single because they are scared shitless to have someone who can make them retaliate from what is planted into their minds. Because they know that there is someone who can make them have a different perception of love... And this new perception will be good, better than what they had before.

Someday, this will be dedicated to someone. I fell in love with the song but could not give justice to it. Obligatory disclaimer: I sang this in one blow last night, listened to it awhile ago, realized how pitchy it was, and added the Ambient Vocals in the background (to semi-conceal the flubs). Pay attention to the last part, I included a photo, which I have been meaning to post and blog about. Again, if you decide to press the Play button... Earphones!

The Only Exception (Cover) from Trizia Lim on Vimeo.

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I WOULD

This is one shotgun post as it is almost 4 in the morning and I am still trying to catch up on Smallville (still in Season 5, I know, I am way out of the loop). Tom Welling has been my number one crush since high school and I had to announce my love for him in a magazine. See, when I was 16, I thought that I would not feel embarrassed when the time comes that I decide to say this: "Oh, who was I crushing on when I was 16? Who are the people important in my life?". No, I did not think that today, I am gonna regret seeing this: "My family and Tom Welling." So, friends, do not ever think that you knew all too well when you were 16. There are things and decisions that you will most likely regret and you will realize these in 4 years. I dated a pervert when I was 16. See? I'm just kidding.

FUCK. I DID NOT EVEN MENTION MY FRIENDS.

It takes a while for me to read the comments that are posted here (but now, I already synced my blog email to my BlackBerry). Two comments stood out of the few. 1. Do you have a boyfriend? Or girlfriend? and 2. Kumakain ka ba ng isaw? (Do you eat chicken intestines?). I AM DEDICATING AN ENTRY ON THESE TWO TOPICS. I WILL WRITE THEM LONGER THAN ANY OF MY ENTRIES HERE.

Okay, I know my graduation entry is delayed and I do not intend to make one now. But this is what I wore. I'm posting a full body shot soon. Dress my the lovely Shai dela Merced, owner of Provocouture You can see the top. I am typing with one eye open. I am sorry about the babble.



Photo by: Clara Tan

I wanna be your sister....

Ha ha ha! For sure!

Ask me anything. Tell me something.

TRAVELIN' GIRL

I feel like such a wimp for re-posting the things that I have written in my Chictopia and pasting them here. I have promised myself--countless times already, that I will blog religiously but I have been slow on updates. But since I am bored as a lone tree, I may have to flood.

“I’m a travelin’ girl… I wanna go… I wanna be free…” — Travelin’ Girl by The Bitters

I have been stalling my updates in my main blog and here—because these are the only things I find interesting in the weblog, not to mention, these are considered to be my outlet… my escape to boredom. My cousin and co-owner of NeverForget Clothing Clara and I have been busy fabric shopping and coming up with designs for our next collection, hence, the turtle-like updates here. On top of that, I am busy trying to relocate my mindset to something more appealing, something more tangible—I mean, my dreams of being the next president of my country is something that I should not think about ATM. The following weeks will be busy, a buzz-kill from my bum life. In cases of bad hair days, lazy days, etc. a messy ponytail would be perfect—okay, this is me trying to insert the relevance of my whereabouts to this outfit.

These are the photos which I posted in my Travelin' Girl look on Chictopia.









Here are the add-ons:


This my dog Harley. He's is running around my room as I type.




All photos by Clara Tan. You can visit her other blog HERE--a must-visit!

THE DRAWING BOARD

"Every time I think we’ve reached the end, we just meet back here and do it again.” – The Drawing Board, The Features

Clara and I had a lot of fun taking photos, hence, my stint on the chairs. No, I did not break my neck. I was able to survive the afternoon. The striped “dress” is my brother’s sweater—perfect for a rainy day and it did!

Are you ready for the photo spam? I skipped my other look because I would like to dedicate a full blog about it--my first ever yacht experience! My "The Drawing Board" look beats the rest of my other looks because I have gone through great lengths to "work it" as requested by my cousin Clara's requests. This is especially precious, not to mention exceeds my capacity to bring out the fierce in me (ha ha!). The thing about coming up with a unique outfit does not really require a lot of "thinking". I have noticed (and Clara, too) that the outfits that I have not thought about fully acquire the greatest number of votes and comments. I guess this is the most interesting thing about having a keen eye on the latest finds and the latest trends in fashion--the more spontaneous your outfit is, the better. And my fellow Chictopians seem to appreciate my spontaneous looks and the photography, as well. Thank you very much, lovelies.


Topman sweater worn as dress, brown worn-out belt, Long Champ purse, floral barette, Aldo gold watch, my luck coin and key necklace, wooden bracelet, black stockings, and a pair of brown patent Peter Pan shoes!






While I was standing on the chairs, my cousin and I could not help but curse ha ha ha. It was too funny!

Bringing out my inner fierceness HA HA HA.








Full deets HERE

P.S. So excited about a lot of things. If everything pushes through, I will blog about it here!

CLEMENTINE

I finally decided to upload one of my favorite looks in Chictopia (check out the full deets of the look HERE). I wore this last Saturday for a few drinks with my friends. I deem it mandatory to update the whereabouts of my bum life, I say this is true. Why do I bring this up? I badly want to upload a photo of my first ever ink, which, by the way, received over 500 notes in Tumblr (!!!). I, however, would find it a tad bit reckless as I am not sure if my parents bother to read my blog. I am being mature, well, careful rather.

All my looks in my Chictopia are all music-inspired posts. I love music--I breathe it.

Inspired by Clementine by Sarah Jaffe. I love love love my dress, topped with a nude shade of lipstick. I have been meaning to post a photo of the best accessory yet (I can’t post them here, maybe in my blog?). Slow on updates.











Photos by: Clara Tan

MAKE YOU FEEL MY LOVE/WHEN THE STARS GO BLUE

I know this is a shot right through the heavens. I am coming to terms with the fact that my singing capabilities--or lack thereof, will start and end here in my room. I am just usually bored at night so I decided to sing and bombard the neighbors' ears at 3 in the morning. My fourth attempt, this is. There is a huge gap between the last verse and the bridge and thought of inserting snippets of When The Stars Go Blue by Tyler Hilton Feat. Bethany Joy Galleoti (spell check please).

Make You Feel My Love by Adele from Trizia Lim on Vimeo.

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